Today's experiences, wet dogs and white owls

This morning I went to one of my favorite disc golf courses in Winnipeg, "The Outback" in Kilcona park.  What is it about dogs when they get wet, why do they think it's so hilarious to shake off right next to you?  The dog's owner was yelling no at him, which seemed quite futile given the results.  He jumped on me to add insult to injury.  This was right after I shanked my drive into the woods.

I threw my buzzz, given to me by a super cool guy in town after I had returned a bunch of discs in the spring.  After witnessing another player score an ace with a buzzz, following this crazy bee line at hole 11, happyland, I had to get one of my own.

So today, I was practicing driving with mid-ranges, I didn't expect it to flip to the right so easily.  The morning mist had covered the wet weeds, I was trying to find the right words to express the situation while looking at the mess I had to get through... I couldn't find them, but I suppose thistle dew.

I was about to dive in when the dog sprung in to the woods a few meters to the left of me.  The guy said, "Oh geeze... it's gonna grab it!"

I thought the dog was way off but I guess the scent gave it away, he bounced out and gave it to me without leaving any teeth marks.  I was still a little frustrated about being wet but now that I think about it, the pup was probably thinking, "sorry about fucking with you buddy, here's your disc."

Made me think, I should get a dog.  I would really love to have it for recovering discs like that.  I'm not sure how many other players have their dogs trained well enough to only get them when asked.

It would be fun to try and train one.

So I continued on my game and while picking up a disc, a white owl got scared when I got too close and flew to a different tree.  A beautiful snowy white owl.  I haven't seen one since I was younger.  I was with a guy who I won't name that was hunting.  He shot one.  I don't know why I need to get that out, but it was a shitty situation that made me appreciate... not killing things?

It was a very long time ago, but since then, it was last one I ever saw.  So today, it was a surprise and a delight to spot one that looked to me like a younger fella.  He didn't make a hoo noise but just shrieked at me.  I left him alone and continued playing.  I met up with some friends and played a round, while talking about the owl coming up to the same area, he flew by, and then another one did, and then we noticed another one looking down on us.

It was a whole family.

And those fuckers want to tear down that park.

Disc Golf

I've been thinking about focusing on disc golf when it comes to my writing.  I saw someone in Reddit looking for disc golf bloggers and I really feel like I can be a valuable asset for them.  I've got lots of little adventures that are interesting and I've been wanting to share them.

http://imgur.com/a/kHm4F

The photo's seem to work great for reminding me of all the little things I've seen so far this year.  Some ideas for things that I can write about:

When I find discs, I could do little interviews with their owners.

Happyland drama.  (The skatepark kids using the blocks from the retaining wall for doing tricks on.)

Repairing the broken sign

Course walk-throughs.  Showing pics/vids of the course to help new players find their way before they play.

How disc golf lessons can be applied to life.

doing alright

I've been doing alright.  I haven't bought any drugs in over 2 weeks now.  I smoke some weed with my neighbor occasionally.  Yesterday I played 6 rounds of disc golf.  There are a lot of things, like disc golf, that feel like it's not quite the same without weed.  I'm trying to train my brain to think differently.  I had noticed that I was repeating stupid mistakes when I played while baked.  Learning how to get better and keeping track of all the little things is a lot easier when you have a sober mind.

I've been getting more dreams lately.  Last night I dreamt I was at work and stormed off over an accusation that I was smoking weed at work again.

I'm almost ready to go out and start playing a few rounds, it's not even 6 in the morning yet.  The sunrise at the crack of dawn was amazing today.

bother

Earlier in the spring, I noticed some skaters had taken some retaining blocks from the retaining wall at the park that I play disc golf in.  At the time, I was picking up garbage as I played and was trying to fix the disc golf signs that had been broken.  Seeing the blocks out of place, it bothered me to see that they took the blocks that were in use and didn't touch the ones that had fallen into the creek.  I took it upon myself to carry a block back.  It was difficult and I was sore so I left a note explaining how these blocks had a purpose and if they wanted to put them back, I explained how to do it.  The next day, the note was torn in half.  I took another block that day and figuring it was a decent lil morning workout, I continued to put the blocks back, one at a time, every morning.  When I was done, I took some blocks out of the creek and left them for the skaters.

They never used them, instead, they brought in a bunch of other cinder blocks and made an actual wall.  They poured concrete in it, put steel sheets on top and added an edge so they could grind on it.

Alright, whatever, it wasn't any of my business anyway.  Yesterday, I noticed the same blocks that I put back were gone.  The gravel that I poured in was on the ground.  Today, I found them set up by the skate park area again.  It really seemed like they took those blocks, in particular, just to spite me.

I guess it's working, because I'm bothered by this.  I'm thinking of phoning the park people or someone with the authority to do something about this.

Being ready for the future

In the flood of 97, the Canadian army assisted with sandbagging.

I'd like to join a group that just did that, people that help out in disasters like a soldier.

I'm thinking that to be fulfilled in what I do, I should be putting myself in dangerous situations in order to help others.

I should at least look into it.

I can tell that I'm putting a favorable image out there.  It's hard not to.  I'm wondering how easy it is to connect my real name to this blog and I've already put some things on here that make me feel vulnerable enough.  I don't want to post my weaknesses and how I'm trying to solve these problems that I continue to create.

I am weak sometimes.

I fail.

There are a lot of "I's" in this blog post.

All my life, who am I?

Quitting

I do this a lot.  I tell myself that I'm going to stop smoking weed, and I try.  I get frustrated around people and nobody really understands.  I've been thinking about getting help in this.  I've been able to quit by myself in the past but, a lot of the times when I give it an attempt, I fail.  Today, I'm out, it'll only be a matter of time before my mind starts expecting something that I won't give it.

I've read that this is a non-unified state of mind (part of me is saying yes, while the other part is saying.  I'm living in a state of chaos when I fight myself internally.

There's only one person driving this ship and that guy does not want to be a pothead today.

I miss my dreams.  I miss being witty.  I miss the people that I care about.

I will not miss my mark.

life path

Chandra has asked me to move in with her under the condition that I quit smoking pot.

It's something that I believe is possible and I just can't imagine a life without her.  I miss her and Tal a lot and I really do want to quit wasting my time in a lifestyle that is hardly ever sober.  If I'm ever going to get up, go to school and find a more fulfilling career, I can't do it while smoking weed everyday.  I want to unleash my potential and have the ability to be there for the people that I care for.  I want to be their hero.

It seems simple, but pot and I have had a long love/hate relationship that I need to get out of.  There's going to be periods of frustration and emotional meltdowns.  I can't let those break me down.  I need to handle stress and anxiety through different means.  Jogging sounds like a good activity to get into.

Getting into photo/videography sounds like something more valuable that I should put my money into.