existence or extinction

My parents are approaching their 70's.

I feel like I will soon be regretting the time that I ignored them.  The rest of the family is going over for my mom's birthday and I just am not interested.

When I see her, she's usually the same cheerful person.  It's her online persona that bothers me so much.  She says a lot of horrible and ignorant things.

I feel like an asshole.  I just want to get away from them but there isn't a lot of time left to spend with them.  We'd probably have to sell the farm and that place is loaded with memories.  My brother, sister and I are going to have to inherit the business and I feel like I should be doing way better at that already.

I don't agree with their beliefs and may be a little upset with how they raised me but they didn't beat me or anything like that.

Today, I have to take Tal to her engineering thing but I think I will spend more time with my parents when I have the opportunity in the future.

Thinking about the disagreements we have, like with religion and climate change, it seems based on these disparities that neither side can prove.  In the big picture, I don't know if the fights that I'm championing are worth the effort.

Climate change is happening.  We can't stop it.  Getting on a soap box and screaming and humanity is only going to be an effort in futility.  I can't change the things I need to change.  There are no options for a pick up truck that runs on electricity and our heat comes from burning gas.

Life is going to carry on long after I'm gone.  We might have to take a step or two back and there might not be as many of us but we'll still be kicking.

I've thought about how this may be the most important fight of our existence.  That if we can't get our shit together, we're not going to build space ships and we're going to die with the planet.

I'm starting to wonder if that's just one big science fantasy.

And I remember what it's like to be a Christian, how it seems like all we have to do is correct the moral choices of society and God will take care of everything.

We're both butting heads, fearing the end of humanity and pushing for some Utopian dream, for me it's space travel or dying with the Earth, for her, it's heaven and hell.